It has been a while...as always.

I have been going through some things. Our decision to end treatment namely being a huge crux in my lack of updating. It was such a difficult decision. I slipped in to a depression, gained all my weight back and then some, and have been down. I am up to 214lbs. This is the heaviest I've ever been with the exception of pregnancy. It has been SO hard to get back on track. Keep in mind I still eat healthier than most. I don't eat refined sugar, I don't eat grains, etc. I have incorporated dairy back in to my diet and I think this has contributed to overall weight gain coupled with eating 'paleo snacks' for breakfast/lunch/dinner... snacks are not wholesome even if they are paleo.

So... I am starting tomorrow. Another 'whole whatever' journey.

We were going to begin more extensive fertility treatment this month but I am postponing it until the following month. I need to get my dieting/lifestyle under control and my weight at a more manageable number.

I finally joined a gym. I didn't want to but I feel like it will keep me motivated. I need to stop making excuses for not going and just do it. At $93/month I better. I had to lower my cable bill (1st world problems) and discontinue a subscription in order to pay for it...but it now balances out.

I'll keep an update of how that is going. I am hoping to log my food and fitness here. With photos... blah...the before photos will come after lol.

Tomorrow is Bryce's 6th birthday...he's so excited. He thinks 6 is so grown up and I'll let him believe that.

I started a new job. I'm teaching children from China to speak English. I LOVE this job. I make good money...I'm happy...I'm valued...I is kind...I is smart...I is important. I seriously love it. The hours are very early...I'm talking 4-5am to 9-10am...so that part has taken some adjustment... I always was a night owl..staying up until 2-3 and getting up around 9. It was a schedule that worked for us. So this has been a huge change. I miss my 'me' time at night... if I can get Bryce's bed time down to 8pm I'd gain about 2 hours of me time...right now he's in bed at 9 and by the time he gets up for his eighth drink of water it's time for me to go to bed too.

Anyone have insight on how to get back on the eating track and fitness track? I really want to stick with it.